Author Archives: Cindy

About Cindy

I am a city girl turned country girl. I moved to the country for my first teaching job and 32 years later I am still here. My husband and I are blessed to have a son and a daughter and son-in-law AND we have two "granddogs" who we love to spoil.

#SuttonStrong One Year Later

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“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” 
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV)

I stood by the bedside, his tiny hand in mine. Monitors beeped. A maze of tubes were connected all over his baby body. Eyes closed, he laid there so very still; his tender skin the color of the hospital sheets. My heart shattered.

She stood beside me, my hand on hers as she explained everything that had happened. Her words caught in her throat; my breath caught in mine. Eyes full of tears, she remained there so very bravely. My soul shuddered.

I stood beside his bedside. I stood beside her. My legs barely able to hold the weight of it all. My eyes so full of overwhelming love, witnessing such indescribable pain. Our world, shaken. 

How could this be where we were? No warning signs. No clues. No red flags to prepare us for how a small, undetected hole deep inside would change life as we’d known it. And it seemed that we each began carrying a hole deep inside us  too, carved out by the grief flowing through it all. Me being me, just wanted to make things better, but of course, I couldn’t.

“Jesus replied, ‘What is impossible with man is possible with God.’”
Luke 18:27 (NIV)

I stand beside him, his not so tiny hand in mine. Car horns beep. Neighbors wave as we meander our way through the neighborhood on our evening walk. There’s nothing still about him at all. I’m lucky to keep up with him at all. My heart soars!

What’s impossible for us is possible with God!

She stands beside me, hands me a mask, and explains everything they’re doing. This girl of mine, a Medical Mommy extraordinaire. Dad too! Words of pride well up in my throat. Eyes full of competence and confidence, they remain, taking care of what needs to be done every day, heroes without capes to me. My soul sings!

What’s impossible for us is possible with God!

I stand beside him. I stand beside her. My legs barely able to hold the weight of all the joy. Our eyes full of overwhelming love and gratitude, we are witnesses to so many indescribable miracles. Our world shifts. 

What’s impossible for us is possible with God!

It’s been a year today since Sutton’s intestines unexpectedly moved from his abdominal cavity, up through a little hole in his diaphragm, collapsed his lung, and pushed his heart to the opposite side from where it should’ve been. His near lifeless body was life-flighted to Nationwide Children’s Hospital. There, he lost most of his intestine and now he must receive all his nutrition intravenously through a line in his heart. 

So, how can we be where we are today? Sutton home and trying to do all his big brothers do? Only through God’s grace and strength, overwhelming love, wonderful doctors and nurses, the support of many, and lots and lots of prayer. 

The doctors were able to repair Sutton’s hole in his diaphragm. Though it’s a slow process, our “holes” are beginning to heal too, but only because…say Jesus’s words with me one more time:

“What is impossible with man is possible with God.”
Amen!

 

Stir ~ Five Minute Friday

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“The LORD says, ‘Now I will show them my power; now I will show them my might. At last they will know and understand that I am the LORD.’ ” Jeremiah 16:21 (NLT)

Stir or Be Still?

Funny how some things can stir up such conflicting emotions.  The first time I saw these family pictures I couldn’t have been happier. Based on the photo session I wasn’t sure what to expect, but the results were better than I’d hoped for.  I still love them today, however they’ve now also  come to represent for me, a divide in our life.

On the “before” side of the line, these photographs reflect the joy I experienced by having all of us together. We had such a fun weekend celebrating the big boys’ birthdays, walking by the river, and just enjoying each other’s company. Our smiles captured in this moment are genuine. Life felt good! No, better than good. Life felt great!
_______________________________________________________________________________

“After” lives on the other side of the line though. After we received a message we never imagined we would. After our youngest grandson was rushed to the emergency room. After the situation went from bad, to worse, to life threatening. It never occurred to me that soon after they were taken, one of our beloved family photos would be used as a battle cry for prayer, a representation of the desperate hope we were clinging to for living, pink intestines despite the unforeseen traumatic health crisis our precious boy had suffered.

Before and After: an unexpected line etched in the midst of our everyday. Our peace, comfort, sense of safety, and yes, our seemingly great life of the past becomes far removed from the agony we find ourselves standing in now. The devastating pain, the prayers not answered the way we wanted, the unknown, the fear, the guilt, and so much more in the After, seemingly cause the divide to grow even deeper until it feels as if we’re completely separated from everything we’ve known.

“No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:37-39 (NIV)

Unfortunately, we all have or will experience a dividing line sometime in our lives, maybe even more than once. During those hardest of times we feel so many things, including separation. What I’m learning though, is that my feelings can be what often lead me further from God. Maybe you’ve discovered that too? So instead, we need to conquer our emotions and cling to what we know, to what we are “convinced” of.  And that is, as Paul reminds us above, in life and death situations, when we’re caught between good and evil, find ourselves lost in worry about the future, or are trying to hang on during the highs and lows of this world, God’s love is always with us despite how it feels. Always.

Do I need to tell myself this over and over? Yes! Is it harder sometimes more than others? Yes, again. As we quickly approach the year anniversary of my grandson’s life-changing emergency, I find myself once more seeking answers that aren’t there, reliving things I wish I could change but can’t, and swirling in feelings that are all mixed up. I’m a work in progress but, I don’t want a life of constantly jumping the line between Before and After. You either? So how do we bridge the gap? There’s only One Way.

“Be still, and know that I am God!”
Psalm 46:10 (NLT) emphasis mine

No smiles in a photo are needed to know that living this is what leads to a truly great life, before, after, and forever!

https://youtu.be/x–f6pAIQI0

 

 

Danger ~ Five Minute Friday

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“Think about things of heaven, not the things of earth.” Colossians 3:2

In Danger of Being Confined

Wanting to be an involved “MiMi” I purchased some plants from our grandsons’ school fund raiser. Unfortunately, I didn’t think about how they would get to me since I live four hours away.  Needless to say, my daughter had to babysit my flower collection for almost a month before I could pick them up and bring them home.

This morning I set out to get the poor things into my flower bed. It turned out to be more of a challenge than I’d bargained for.  Because they’d stayed so long in their tiny pots, each plant’s leaves had started to become wilted and yellow from the lack of nutrition and all of them had become so root bound that it was difficult to pull them free without breaking their life-giving, delicate stems.

While digging in the dirt it occurred to me that we can be an awfully lot like my waylaid plants. Finding ourselves in less than ideal conditions and so wrapped up in our troubles, we can be in danger of becoming confined if we stay too long in an unhealthy place, too. 

In recent months, someone who’s hurt me in the past did something that left me in a place of pain once again. The more I focused on the situation, the tighter my chest became and the smaller my confidence felt. Hemmed in by my emotions, questions, and disbelief, I was tangled up in the consequences and the wound was all I could see. Been there?

“And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.
Colossians 2:6-7 (NLT)

Today, I finally tore those confining containers from the plants and at long last freed their roots to be placed in the ground where they will now receive what they need to grow. Placing my pain into the Gardner’s hands had the same result for me. I began to understand that though at first I didn’t see it, He could take what was meant to restrict and instead, release me. God used the circumstances to carefully place me where I would thrive in His care. Throughout our lives, we will all face harsh conditions that threaten to break us; but when we are rooted in Christ who gives us life, we receive all we need to not just grow, but to flourish until He finally brings us home where we belong.

“For they are transplanted to the LORD’s own house. They flourish in the courts of our God. Even in old age they will still produce fruit; they will remain vital and green.”
Psalm 92:14 (NLT)

P.S. Here’s hoping my little plants flourish too!

This I Know ~ Five Minute Friday

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“The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8 (NIV)

This I Know

On evenings like this one, looking at the lake feels just like looking in the mirror. The glassy surface casts back the lights and darks of dusk in perfect replication. Each soft hue and even the smallest leaves are reproduced beautifully across the transparent, quiet water. But…

When the tranquility is disturbed by the winds of a storm or something dropped in the midst of the reflection, the image becomes lost among the ripples as they roll toward shore. We know what we had seen, but now it’s impossible to make out.

My image of God can be the very same way. When things are going smoothly in life, I feel as if I can see Him reflecting love, mercy, and generosity back at me. But…

When the peaceful times are disrupted by raging storms of life, or if the unexpected is thrown into my days, I lose sight of God. Seeing Him in difficult times often seems impossible. Maybe for you too?

Looking at God and His plan through our earthly perspective will never allow us to behold His perfect, invariable image. We only get a glimpse of bits and pieces through the waves of our emotions, surging fears, and disrupted dreams. We just can’t make out the whole picture. But…

This I know: Even though we can’t see Him, He sees us. 

“For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer,”
1 Peter 3:12a (NIV)

This I know: Even though it feels as if we’re on our own in restless waters, He is always there.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)

This I know: Someday, we will finally see clearly.

“For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know full, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
1 Corinthians 13:12-13 (NIV)

Narrow Road

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Narrow Road

When I moved to the country one of the many things I had to adjust to were the twisty, narrow roads. I learned that when driving on them you must be focused on what’s in front of you. You can’t spend time looking in the rear view mirror or getting distracted by what you’re passing by. It’s always important to be prepared for other travelers who might pop around a curve coming your direction, being fully aware there’s barely enough room for both to pass.

Jesus tells us that the road to life with Him is also narrow. It occurs to me that navigating His road is similar to heading out on my country roads. On our journey that leads to life, we must keep our eyes fixed on what’s ahead. Once we choose the narrow way, we don’t need to spend time looking back on our past or worry about what might be passing us by because nothing compares with where we’re going or Who we’re traveling with! And I wonder? Might one of the reasons the road to life everlasting is narrow, be so that we will come close to those heading in the opposite direction? Then, being prepared, we’re able to show them the new Way before they go on their OWN way.

We’ve all heard the song lyrics, “Country roads take me home” and around here, they do. But no matter where we are, let’s make sure it’s the “narrow road,” leading us to our true Home, that we’re traveling on.
“But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” Matthew 7:14

As Fast As A Blink Of An Eye

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“Don’t brag about tomorrow, since you don’t know what the day will bring.” Proverbs 27:1 (NLT)

Fast As A Blink Of An Eye

It’s hard to believe, but in a few months I will have lived here in the mountains for forty years. Forty years! Pretty amazing for a gal who was only going to stay for one. (God and the guy in this photo changed that plan.) I honestly don’t know where those years have gone. My grandparents used to tell me that the older you get, the faster time passes.  I didn’t understand it back then, but my goodness, I sure do get it now! In a blink of an eye, the 23 year old child pictured here, became the 63 year old sitting in front of this laptop today.  A lot of life has been lived within the flutter of that eyelid. I pray for many more blinks before God changes my plan and leads me to a new home again, but we never know, do we?

“It will happen in a moment, in the blink of an eye, when the last trumpet is blown. For when the trumpet sounds, those who have died will be raised to live forever. And we who are living will also be transformed.” 1 Corinthians 15:52 (NLT)

“However, no one knows the day or hour when these things will happen, not even the angels in heaven or the Son himself. Only the Father knows.” Mark 13:32 (NLT)

The world shudders in fear as it awaits Jesus’s return. We can sense it all around us! The amazing thing is, when we know Jesus, fear is replaced with anticipation as we wait for Him. Maybe like me you’ve experiences a quiet trembling deep within your soul that’s a recognition  we are standing on the brink of something great, something we long for and yet, do not understand.

Ecclesiastes 3:11 tells us that God “planted eternity in the human heart.” Just picture it: at the moment we accept the gift of salvation, Our Father buries a seed that begins to grow. It then takes root in our lives producing a hope that carries us through every day, month and year of this life, and then, in a “blink of an eye” into our future of life-eternal with Him.

Yes, it’s hard to believe how fast life passes…In a blink of an eye. We need to understand that with the simple opening and closing of an eyelid everything can change.  Everything WILL change! My friends, we must be ready. Are you? There’s no time to waste. 

“This is all the more urgent, for you know how late it is; time is running out. Wake up, for our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed.” Romans 13:11 (NLT)

Wake Up and Smell the Coffee ~ Five Minute Friday

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“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” 1 Corinthians 10:31 (NIV)

Wake Up and Smell the Coffee

“You shall have no other gods before me.” Exodus 20:3 (NIV)
 “You shall not make for yourself an idol of any kind or an image of anything in the heavens or on the earth or in the sea.”
Exodus 20:4 (NLT)

May I be completely honest with you? I’ve taken pride in myself where this Commandment is concerned. Sure that I would never break it, I haven’t let it worry me one bit, that is, until the prompt this week was coffee and I began to ponder on it.

Every single morning when I get up, no matter where I am, the first thing I do is seek out a cup of coffee. Sitting in the quiet, I take my time and linger with it. The planning of my day goes better because I include my morning coffee in it, and between you and me, one cup is never enough, I always desire more. Even when I’m in a hurry, I don’t let that keep me from having my coffee. I’ll skip other things just to be sure I start my day with a cup. When I’m on the go? There’s no question, I bring coffee along with me. Thinking back, I can’t recall a day in I don’t know how long, that I’ve left coffee out of my routine.

Oh my! Coffee! The Lord is using my morning coffee not to waken me as I do, but rather to
A-waken me to the truth.

Idol: anything regarded with blind devotion. 

Devotion: an earnest attachment. 

I’m afraid you’ll have to agree, this sums up my feelings about coffee pretty accurately. Now you might be saying, there’s nothing wrong with a cup of coffee or two and that’s what I told myself at first, too. Until that is, I began comparing my relationship to coffee with my relationship with God and is it ever eye-opening!

Thinking about the description above, I began replacing the word coffee with God:

“Every single morning when I get up, no matter where I am, the first thing I do is seek God. Sitting in the quiet, I take my time and linger with Him. The planning of my day goes better because I include, God in it. I always desire more of God. I’ll skip other things just to be sure I start my day with God. When I’m on the go? I am sure to bring God along with me”……. The truth? While these statements are spot on about my morning coffee habit, I’m ashamed to say they’re all questionable in regard to my mornings with God. On top of that, I can remember many mornings when I’ve left God completely out of my routine, promising myself I’d get to Him later, but then never did.

Idol: anything regarded with blind devotion. 

Devotion: an earnest attachment. 

Here’s the bold, full strength, dark roasted question: Have I made for myself an idol that I put before my God? 

“This is why it is said: ‘Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.’ Be very careful, then, how you live-not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.”
Ephesians 5:14-17 (NIV)

Once again, the Holy Spirit has used my everyday to help me, and maybe you too, understand what the Lord’s will for our lives is. Has He given you, like me, something to ponder? If not coffee, is there something you you might be regarding with blind devotion and putting before God? It’s my hope that we’ll “wake up and smell the coffee,” making the most of this opportunity to change what’s needed to live more wisely and choose to put God first in our lives, where He’s always belonged.

Spring ~ Five Minute Friday

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“My child, listen to what I say, and treasure my commands. Tune your ears to wisdom, and concentrate on understanding.” Proverbs 2:1-2 (NLT)

Spring has Sprung

I love everything about Spring, especially all the “re’s”: renewal, refreshment, rebirth, and return. There’s something so hopeful in tiny, green leaves appearing again on branches that once were barren, or the sweet, earthy smell of the first Spring rain that begins to replenish the ground. I’m always amazed when the bulbs buried deep beneath the ground come to life each year after being frozen below. That’s the thing about Spring, there are signs of promise everywhere!

For me, there’s one sure sign that Spring has sprung and that’s when the Robins find the way back to my front yard from their winter homes. Once they arrive, joyful song greets the morning and flitters on the evening air. The winter-worn grass becomes dotted with  red breasts hopping happily from one side to the other appearing to do a welcome back waltz with one another. Would you be surprised if I told you that watching Robins reminds me of something important in my, our, relationship with God? 

A Robin’s process for satisfying its hunger is fascinating! Cocking its head to one side, this amazing bird stands perfectly still and well, just listens. Moments later, it hops a few paces, stops, and listens again. This continues until suddenly the Robin moves into action diving its yellow beak into the ground and coming up with a worm. How is this sure sign of Spring able to hear something as quiet as an earthworm? It remains a mystery but it is a lesson for us.

“Be still and know that I am God.”
Psalm 46:10a (NLT)

“So faith comes from hearing, that is, hearing the Good News about Christ. Then he added, ‘Pay close attention to what you hear. The closer you listen, the more understanding you will be given-and you will receive even more.’”

Mark 4:24 (NLT)

“But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says.”
James 1:22a (NLT)

Following the example of a Robin, to be nourished we too must stop all the “song and dance” we’re doing in our day to day lives.  Then, we need to find time to be perfectly still and just listen. Hearing God speak can be a mystery too, but through His Word, in song, at church, or with His very voice we can hear Him. And when we do, we must then step in closer and listen some more.

Scripture reminds us though (as does our red-breasted friend) that it doesn’t stop there. Listening isn’t enough. We must then take action. What we are called to do will be different for each of us and we never know who will be watching. What we do know is that He will satisfy our needs.

Spring has Sprung! Are you ready? Let’s be Robins in a world that needs to find its way and celebrate “Spiritual Spring” every day of our lives: Rebirth in Christ, Renewal of our Souls, Refreshment in His Word, and the Promise of Christ’s Return.

 

Carry ~ Five Minute Friday

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The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense. Proverbs 27:9 (NLT)

Carry

Growing up in the days of vinyl albums and record players, I can remember lifting the arm up off the record and moving it to my favorite song over and over again. Back then the album I listened to most was Carole King’s Tapestry. And the song that was repeatedly played? “You’ve Got a Friend.” The chorus went something like this:

You just call out my name,
And you know wherever I am,
I’ll come running.

To have friends that when called, meet us in our need is a priceless gift.

“Soon the house where he was staying was so packed with visitors that there was no more room, even outside the door. While he was preaching God’s word to them, four men arrived carrying a paralyzed man on a mat. They couldn’t bring him to Jesus because of the crowd, so they dug a hole through the roof above his head. Then they lowered the man on his mat, right down in front of Jesus.” Mark 2:2-4 (NLT)

These men not only committed to carrying their paralyzed friend to where Jesus was, but they  didn’t let it stop them when they encountered the large crowd. Knowing the wait would keep them longer didn’t deter them from seeking help for the one they held in their hands. They’d come with the intent of walking home alongside their friend so, they came up with an “over the top” idea that landed him right at Jesus’ feet. The result? After encountering Jesus, the man jumped up, grabbed his own mat, and walked through the crowd toward home. 

To have friends who will go out of their way to lay our needs at Jesus’ feet, is a priceless gift.

I am the recipient of this priceless gift. Friendship abounds in my life! I’m sustained by a circle of women who don’t just walk into my challenging times, they run. When it seems impossible, they lift me up. Unable to move under the weight of my burdens, together, my dear friends help bear them and they don’t hesitate to lay them out before Jesus. Without thought, their plans change when my pleas for help reach them. They hold me in my grief, are a support when I fail, and offer solutions when I can’t see my way. And you know what? I do the very same for each of them.

But more than this, the love of friends spans all seasons of life and so, we also share in each others’ joys, encourage dreams, celebrate victories, and laugh. A lot! Through thick and thin, ups and downs, happy and sad, laughter and tears, we’re always there for each other as we walk hand in hand through this life, looking forward toward Home. 

I am truly blessed to know what it means to have friends. I pray, that you do too.

“A friend loves at all times,” Proverbs 17:17a

Tired ~ Write 28 Day Challenge

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“Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV)

Tired

Meet Jinx, one of our neighborhood vagabond cats. Well, that was my name for him when he’d stop by. He was especially attracted to my bird feeders. There he’d sit, poised for action, head raised, still as a statue, focused, and that’s where he’d stay for most of his visit. It was evident Jinx felt in control of the situation. He’d keep an eye on everything around him, anticipating, thinking he was ready for whatever flew his way. The birds however, felt differently and after a while, Jinx would tire of standing guard and seek out a sunny spot to rest.

Oh my, how I’m a lot like Jinx! Always on alert, I too keep close watch on those around me. With my mind roused by what I imagine, I create scenarios of how I might need to be prepared to act. I actually fool myself into believing I have some sort of control and feel ready for whatever comes my way. Life however, feels differently. Honestly, “rehearsing disaster” and always being on guard is just exhausting. I’m tired of spending my days (and nights) that way. Any other “Jinxes” out there?

“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the LORD: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God, and I trust him.” Psalm 91:1-2 (NLT)

We know that troubles can swoop in on us at any time. The Psalmist is reminding us that we don’t have to let it, or the anticipation of it, leave us frozen in place. We’re not alone. We have someone to go to, our Refuge. Trusting God allows us to release our worry and find rest. 

“Then Jesus said, ‘Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”
Matthew 11:29

I don’t know about you, but I’m still learning this lesson. What I am beginning to understand, is that the longer I live, and I hope the same is true for you, the more we experience what the Psalmist knew and shared. And, Ole Jinx? He prompts us to remember that when we step away from what burdens us, and seek out the Son, that’s where we’ll find a place of rest for our souls.